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How to Leave the Past Behind

onlinecounsellingcollege:

When you’re feeling overwhelmed with your sadness and loss, it’s hard to believe that your life will ever change, or you’ll ever be able to smile or laugh again. But the truth is you will – it won’t always be this bad – and there are things you can do help move on with your life:

1. Decide to face your pain. An unresolved past never really goes away. You may think you have buried your anger and pain but the hurt is still there and it will surface later on. If you don’t face what happened, and the feelings it unleashed, you will end up being ruled by your subconscious mind. So try and find the courage to revisit all the pain.

2. Accept there’s nothing you can do to change the past. What’s happened has happened, and what’s done is done. There’s nothing you can do to turn back the hands of time, or to rewrite the story so the ending’s happier. But you can change how you think, and you can start over again, and build a different future that’s not poisoned by the past.

3. Be grateful for the good times. There’s usually something good that you can be thankful for. You don’t have to pretend that everything was bad – or write off any good times and happy memories.

4. Consciously let go and set your focus on the future - Don’t let the baggage, or the failures of the past, affect your identity or self esteem. You are NOT what you did, or how you acted previously. You’re not just a product of what happened to you. You are valuable, unique and you have so much to give. You’re the author of your future; you control your destiny.

5. Remove your past from your future. We all have a tendency to think that the past will morph into our future – and become our lot in life. But that doesn’t have to happen. The future’s a blank page. You can change your expectations – and work towards those goals. Instead, look hard for the exceptions – the times when things went right – and notice what you did that resulted in success. You still have those same strengths, skills and great qualities.

6. Be realistic and take small steps at first. You can’t snap your fingers - and find that life has changed. Accept it will take time, and you will still have some bad days – but if you keep on going then the past will lose its grip.

1 week ago • 1,362 notes

Anonymous:

yall grown ass old heads making light of a 20 year old murdered. yep.

kingjaffejoffer:

In the No Jumper interview, he describes rooming with a gay inmate whom he repeatedly calls “a faggot.” He says he told a guard: “If he does anything I disapprove of, I’m gonna kill him.” After a week or two, when his cell mate"started staring,“ Onfroy responded by placing the boy’s head on a concrete slab in the cell and stomping. “I was gonna kill him,” he says, “because of what he did, because I was naked. He was staring at me. I started strangling him.”

The boy screamed. “The guard hears him, and I’ve got his blood all over my hands, all of my chest, literally… I was going crazy. I smear his blood on my face, on my hands. I got it, like, in my nails. I got it all over me. I was going fucking crazy.”

The guards opened the cell and pulled Onfroy off. “I told you I would kill him,” the rapper reports saying. He contends the guards didn’t charge him. Instead, they told him to clean up. His mother was visiting, and when she spotted blood under his fingernails, she asked what had happened. When he responded, “This n**** did some gay shit, so I had to crack his head open,” she began crying.

——-

Ayala moved into Dickemz’ house with Onfroy that day and almost immediately noticed something was off. According to her deposition and an interview, two weeks after moving in, Ayala admired a childhood friend’s new grills in a Snapchat video she posted. It prompted Onfroy to grab her iPhone 6S, smash it on the floor, and strike her hard in the face. He later fixed the phone, but Ayala was stunned. “I got slapped for no reason,” she says, “and he kept acting like everything was cool.”

Later that day, Ayala says, Onfroy hit her again. “I was really lightheaded,because the slap was so hard,” she recalls. “It was one of those slaps where you hear ringing.” She sat for a second in a daze. Onfroy told her to wait and then left the room. He returned holding a long-handled barbecue fork and a wire barbecue brush. “He was like, ‘Which one do you want me to use?’”

Ayala was confused. “Like, use for what?” In a deposition given seven months later, she recounts to a prosecutor: “He told me to pick between the two, because he was going to put one of them up my vagina.” She chose the fork. Then, Onfroy began pulling up her black-and-white striped dress. He lightly dragged the fork against the skin of her thigh. Ayala passed out.

“When I came to, I remember just thinking, I cannot let this happen to me,” she says. “This, right here, cannot happen to me.”

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http://www.miaminewtimes.com/music/the-real-story-of-rapper-xxxtentacion-10410980

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6 months ago • 6,466 notes

Creating a Day Worth Living

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. Get up early

2. Express gratitude for what you have

3. Do something productive

4. Do something fun

5. Do something for someone else

6. Get some sunlight

7. Exercise – it doesn’t matter what – just do some exercise

8. Put a smile in someone’s face

9. Express gratitude or compliment someone

10. Learn or do something new.

Source: cornercanyoncounseling.com

7 months ago • 3,363 notes